Last Exit from the Park

We went to the playground today. It was packed and riddled with an unusual amount of debris and swarming with the usual amount kids, which is to say that every kid in Sunset Park was there. More amazing than the amount of kids is the fact that no one collided with Boo Boo. It’s like babies have a built in force field. Big Kids see them and they might has well be wearing signs saying DO NOT TOUCH. I think there is a general understanding among kids babies are both cute and volatile. If you crash into them they will explode. There were many big kids and Boo Boo is obsessed with big kids, and now that he walks he thinks he’s one of them. They play tag, they do parkour on the playground equipment, they play soccer. They run past Boo Boo in blurs. A blur with pigtails. A blur with braids. A blur with light-up sneakers. Some of the blurs stopped every once in a while to wait their turn at the slide or to throw a ball. One blur, the one with braids, materialized in front of Boo Boo.

“Cute baby!” The she ran off to become a blur again.

Though we are at the same place, our experience at the park is totally different. Boo Boo reacts to everything he sees, and I react to him. His experience is a visual, aural and tactile soup that is delicious to him even if he can’t make sense of it all the time, and my experience is making sure he does not kill himself. While the big kids were blurs, the whole experience was a whirlwind and the only way I can think to write about it is stream of conscious. As a result this whole thing looks like it was ripped out of that crazy chapter in Last Exit to Brooklyn. Okay, they’re all crazy, but if you read the book you’ll know which one I’m talking about!

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Mom! There’s a person! My eyes are level with his eyes, but my eyes are level with your knees! Why are your knees all the way up there? HI! HI! Look at his cheeks I want to touch them. Boo Boo, we do nice touch to his cheeks, yes, gentle. I want to use the steering wheel! You, cheeky person, want to use it too, but I want it. AAHHHH AHHH AHHH. Boo Boo you have to share the steering wheel! Let him play with it too! Look, you have a face. We are both using the steering wheel and we both have a face. Heyyy! Heyyy! Here’s my face. In your face. What does your face feel like if I put my hand on your face? I know, so cute. He’s 15 months. Oh, yours is 18 months? Yes. He’s a big guy. Will your cheeks make a sound if I pat them? Pat. Pat. Pat. Soft touch nice cheeks. Will my forehead make a sound if it touches your forehead? Why are you crying do you need a hug? You are still crying. Let me hug you some more. Really tight. Strong hug. Boo Boo, I think the other baby needs space. Ha, ha, yeah this is how he treats his stuffed animals. Oh look! A spoon on the ground! My favorite! I love spoons! Spoons are for eating! What can I eat around here? Oh no, Boo Boo let’s get rid of that. (Runs to trashcan with spoon). Oh look! Another spoon on the ground! Oh jeeze, more spoons? (Runs to trashcan again). Oh look! Another spoon on the ground! Oh for fuck’s sake. Boo Boo, let’s go on the slides. I know you want to go on the slides. Yes! Shiny poundy drum thing. Bang bang on loud metal slide! Great noise! OOOOHHH! Big noise! OOOOOH! Best noise ever bang bang! WOOOOOW! Oh! There is a big kid on top! Can I reach big kid? Let me see! How do I get up this loud marvelous thing? Hey, Boo Boo! Let’s go up the stairs, and then you can go down the slide! So many big kids! So many feet! Look how many feet there are! And legs! So close to my face. Can I grab the kid legs and feet? If I capture kid legs and feet will they make a sound? If I capture kid legs and feet will they take me with them to where they run? Okay Boo Boo! Let’s not do that. (Grabs hand and places on rail) Look! Oh! Oooooo! My hand is on shiny red metal thing. Very nice. Gee. Must lift leg really high. Kid legs are hard to grab. Look! Eh! I made it up the steps! Oh! By myself! AAA AA A! Good job, Boo Boo! Look, the slide is over here! Let’s go down! Oh, hey! It’s shiny poundy drum thing. Bang Bang Bang! AAA AAA AA!!! Boo Boo, there’s kids in line. Gotta keep it moving. Okay! Okay! Here I go! I like to put my hand first then  my eyes then my tummy and then my feet. Here I come! HA HA HA HA! Oh look! A bouncy orb. I want the orb. Come here orb. I shall have it and pick it up and throw it and chase it and pick it up and throw it and chase it and pick it up and throw it. Boo Boo that’s not your ball. This ball belongs to this nice kid over there. Oh, you’re going to share the ball, that’s so sweet. Boo Boo this kid is SHARING the ball. He’s very nice to SHARE the ball with you. Big kid is looking at me because he wants my orb. I captured it, but I want to hear what it sounds like when I bounce it in his direction. What will he do if I bounce it in his direction? Yes! Good job Boo Boo! Now he’s going to bounce it back to you. Thank you soooo much! Oh! Oh! Big kid bounces it back and now it is my hostage again! It feels so full and big in my arms. I want to hold it but I also want to hear what it sounds like when I bounce it because I already forgot. Very nice! Oh, he’s rolling it back to you, Boo Boo! Oh wow this is so much fun! Orb is so fast though and it’s under a thing and OH NO! It has new captor! A crying captor! A crying captor who is not a big kid. He has tears and the orb. AAAAAAAA. EEEEH? Okay. Oh man. I’m sooooo sorry! This is not our ball. We should share it if it were but this ball belongs to this kid! See the kid! I know, you’re so sad. Why is mommy talking to kid who has tears and the orb? Now she has orb. What is she going to do with it? Does she want to hear what is sounds like when she bounces it on the hard ground? Will the big kid pass her the orb if she bounces it to him? Sorry, thanks for SHARING that is so nice. Boo Boo say thank you. (gives ball back) WAIT WHAT WHY DID SHE NOT BOUNCE IT? WHY DID SHE NOT BOUNCE THE ORB? AAAAAA? EEEH? AAAAA? Okay, time to leave! Say bye Boo Boo! Bye! EEEERGHHH? WHAT WHY? WHY ARE WE DOING THIS? WHY ARE WE NOT BOUNCING THE ORB? AAAAAAAAAHHHHH! AAAAAAAAH! Okay, Let’s see. (looks for pacifier) I know, I know, life is hard, but we have to go home. (finds pacifier) Here, Boo Boo. Oh my gosh, wow. This thing. This thing is the best. Take me mommy. Take me home. Are we there yet. Are we there yet. Look it’s the sky. It’s still there! It’s so crazy how it’s here every day! Can I be here every day, too?